Confidence Blog

“Oh my word, I have been lumbered with making a Health and Safety presentation to my department. I’ve never done this before, and I can’t get out of it. Help!” Elaine said anxiously as she took off her coat, brushing past me.

Elaine’s like that.

So not wasting time, I asked her, “How would you rate your self-confidence, where 1 is totally confident and 10 is whoa, no confidence at all.”

I think you guessed it; she went for a full 10. No surprises there.

In her anxiety, Elaine had forgotten a particular technique that I taught her a few sessions ago, that she can use at will to raise her self-confidence level, and allow her to make a fantastic presentation.

We went over it again: divide a paper into two columns; in the left column jot down why she feels unconfident about the event. In the other column, write down the first thought that comes to her mind as to how she would like to feel for each reason she felt uneasy.

I watched as her mind started ticking over, searching for the rest of the technique. So I continued, “As far in advance of the presentation as possible, pick one obstacle with its counter feeling…”

“Oh, yeah, and find a quiet place where I will not be disturbed for approximately five minutes,” Eileen interrupted. “I remember now. The idea is for me to imagine how I would like to act and feel when making the presentation. I am to imagine me feeling calm and confident, right?”

Correct.

“Continue to work down your entire list. Imagine being confident. As the presentation gets closer, you will feel yourself becoming more confident.”

“And on the day of the event, I fly through it with complete assurance and confidence. I remember it now. I don’t know what I was so nervous about. Silly me!” she finished.

Let me just throw in this bit: it’s important to remember that repetition is the mother of all skill. When you use your imagination to tackle any area where you feel you lack self-confidence, use this method as often as possible, preferably twice daily, until you achieve the results you want.

How much do you value yourself to spend 5 minutes twice a day imagining your own success?

Oh, by the way. I called Elaine to check how she did. And wouldn’t you know it: “I blew them away!” was her response.

Hani Al-Qasem

Hani Al-Qasem and Natalie Dee are the co-authors of the e-book “Self-Confidence Building in 7 Steps.”

Do you want to learn how to have self-confidence to lead a more fulfilling life? Be sure to read the FREE sample of the e-book Self-Confidence Building in 7 Steps and achieve all that you want.

Many of my clients often ask me this question: Were rich and successful people born with self-confidence, or did they have to also work at it?

In other words, were they born with self-assurance, poise and courage, or did they obtain it through repeated practise and determination?

Although we can’t generalise, I tend to find that they became confident by being students of self-confidence; they were exposed to it more than some of us.

Often people who are rich have had role models of confident, ambitious, motivated people in their lives from very early on. And, if they didn’t have it from home, they were drawn to people who were confident from an early age, and mimicked them.

We all mimic people, especially when we’re very young, it’s a human survival mechanism. The more professional term is called finding a ‘role-model’.

These people would also read and listen to anything they could get their hands on relating to self-confidence, motivation, performance, achieving, succeeding and lots more.

The great news here is that you, too, can learn to become totally confident. You can become confident in any area you choose to work on, so long as you have the tools and knowledge at your hands.

You can learn to have and become confident in much the same way that you learned how to drive a car, how to cook, how to sing, how to be good at your job, how to use the computer.

For you to gain self-confidence, start off by believing in yourself, that you can become confident to succeed in anything that you put your mind to. It’s a well known fact that if one person can do it anyone can.

Strengthen your inner self and get your thoughts to gradually gain momentum by making a list of what you would be able to do, have and become once you acquire the confidence that you desire.

Once you have that list, the next step is for you to believe that you can become that confident person, and walk around with the thought and attitude of, “I choose to be confident and my confidence is increasing every day.”

If you wanted to step up and become the confident person you have always wanted to become, would you repeat a certain, powerful phrase or statement to yourself as often as possible?

If your answer is yes, go ahead, right now, repeat this statement 5 – 10 times, preferably out loud:

“I choose to be confident and my confidence is increasing every day.”

Well done!

Hani Al-Qasem

Hani Al-Qasem and Natalie Dee are the co-authors of the e-book “Self-Confidence Building in 7 Steps.”

Do you want to learn how to have self-confidence to lead a more fulfilling life? Be sure to read the FREE sample of the e-book Self-Confidence Building in 7 Steps and achieve all that you want.